“Attitude” is one of the most confidently used, yet least defined words in our vocabularies. We hire for attitude; we fire for it.
It might be “Jill’s got the right attitude!” or “What’s it with Ned and his bad attitude?” You have undoubtedly heard some variation of those words within your business – and perhaps even spoken them yourself.
Attitude permeates our language, training, and performance discussions, but when we use it, what are we talking about?
When we use the word attitude, what do we mean? What’s the definition of the word? And if we understand that, can we actually do anything about attitudes?
When someone has the “right attitude,” what does that mean?
What we are really observing is their behaviours. How they engage customers, how they manage their week, how they respond when things go wrong.
In a jewellery store, this distinction becomes particularly important because so much of success depends on human interaction.
When a team member greets every customer warmly, asks thoughtful questions, follows up on repairs, or takes pride in presenting merchandise beautifully, we often describe them as having a "great attitude".
But those aren't attitudes at all — they're behaviours driven by mindsets. They reflect a belief that every customer deserves an exceptional experience and that every interaction is an opportunity to build trust and long-term loyalty.
We use the word ‘attitude’ as a label for a pattern of behaviours that we see.
But the problem is, what does someone do when they are told they have a good or bad attitude? What does it mean What do they have to change? How do they make the change? It’s impossible for anyone to act on that statement.
This is why we have to stop talking about attitude. It’s a catch-all for all sorts of behaviours. To drive change and create a “better attitude,” we have to focus on their mindsets and behaviours.
Mindsets drive behaviours, and behaviours reveal attitude.
Mindsets are the beliefs, assumptions, and mental models that shape how we interpret everything going on around us. They might include believing our job is to create value with our customers.
Knowing that disciplined execution is critical to our success. Recognising we are accountable for the outcomes we create.
Behaviours are the observable actions, the execution, that flow from these mindsets. If we believe our job is to create value with our customers, the behaviours that dominate are deep customer centricity, curiosity, and comfort with change and complexity.
We demonstrate disciplined execution in how we manage our time during the week, how we prepare for meetings, and how we show up every day at work.
Demonstrating accountability means you don’t blame a loss on bad product, price, or any other excuse.
We recognise that others might have better products or lower prices, and we develop strategies that make those less important in the decision-making process.
When we make this shift to focusing on mindsets and behaviours, we now have something that’s observable, measurable, and most importantly coachable.
I don’t know how to coach attitude.
I do know how to coach customer-centricity, discipline, and accountability. And the person I am coaching understands the focus and how they might improve their performance.
We need to banish the word “attitude” from our conversations. It doesn’t mean anything. It is judgmental yet provides no understanding of the judgments made.
The next time you are tempted to call someone out on their attitude, think about what would be more useful.
Rather than saying, “Dean, you’ve got the wrong attitude in doing the job,” you might say, “Dean, if you improved your discipline, you’ll get huge improvements in how you manage your work week. Let’s talk about what this means and how you might improve your discipline.”
For jewellery store owners, this shift in language has another advantage. It creates consistency across recruitment, performance reviews and day-to-day coaching.
Instead of relying on vague descriptions of the kind of person you want on your team, you can define the mindsets and behaviours that matter to your business.
You can hire for curiosity, coach accountability, recognise disciplined execution and celebrate customer focus.
Those are qualities your team can understand, demonstrate and improve every day—and they ultimately shape the culture and customer experience your business becomes known for.
We drive improvement, development, and learning when we get specific.
When we focus on coaching the specific mindsets and behaviours, we focus on what we see, how it impacts performance, and how we might drive performance.
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